Jacqui and Tom’s secret wedding

Jacqui and Tom
13th November 2021 | St Michael’s Church, Kingsteignton & Dainton Park Golf Club, Ipplepen

Have you ever wished you could plan your wedding without anyone else knowing. A little secret between you and your partner with no outside influence on your special day? Well that’s exactly what Jacqui and Tom did. Their guests assumed they were turning up for a Christening when in-fact they were actually arriving at Jacqui and Tom’s surprise wedding (though they did also Christen their son after the wedding ceremony). After 18 months of shielding thanks to Covid. Jacqui and Tom planned a family reunion to beat all family reunions and surprised their loved ones by tying the knot. Here’s Jacqui to tell us how they planned their secret wedding.

Tom and I met online; one of the Tinder success stories! We met in 2014 and it was obvious from the start that we were just meant to be. Although marriage is something we’ve always talked about, when faced with the question of “where’s the ring?” he’d always joke that I “hadn’t asked him yet”. But that was just us. No fuss. Doing things our way.

 In 2020, just as the Covid pandemic hit, I found out I was pregnant. Chester was number two, preceded by his big sister Brooke. Our pride and joy! We’d had Brooke christened when she was 9 months old, and despite the pandemic, I was keen to keep it similar for Chester. So in July we booked the church, found our venue, and invited our guests.

 One evening we were going over the list and having a chat about what our wedding would be like (we’d recently watched my brother marry his beautiful Maria). I pointed out that as almost everyone we’d invited from Manchester, my homeland, had RSVP’d yes, wouldn’t it be nice to just get married in front of them all. To my shock Tom agreed!! And so there it was; Our Christening became a wedding.

We agreed that as we wanted little fuss we’d keep it between us. Our little secret away from the world. I’m so glad we did as it was something so special for us to share together and it really did mean there was no pressure. It was our way, and we were in charge of our happy ending.

As most of the planning had already been done, it was just a case of informing the Church and venue of our additions and of course finding the rings! Tom was very set on having our rings handmade and we were very fortunate to find a beautiful jewellers in our local area and she really did listen to what we wanted. She even took payment in scrap precious metals which really helped towards the cost of the rings. As I didn’t have an engagement band, we added some sparklers to my ring just to make it pop (what girl doesn’t need sparkle?!)

 We’d set our budget and I challenged myself to reduce, reuse and recycle as much as I possibly could to keep the cost down. I made our Orders of Service using a free app and printed it myself. I made little gifts for both our parents and of course Tom’s sister Grace who was unknowingly our bridesmaid. I sold as many old clothes as I could find and managed to cover a large chunk of the costs just from that. I was in my element!

As the day grew closer, we attended our rehearsal just the two of us. Again, precious moments to treasure. We even treated ourselves to a bag of chips on the way home to celebrate! For those that know us, you’ll know how much just being able to do that meant.

 Tom is 3.5 years into remission and sitting eating a bag of chips after our wedding rehearsal is something we only hoped and wished could happen. We finalised our details and spent the evening before decorating the venue with our beautiful flowers. The morning went smoothly. I did my hair and makeup and made buttonholes for Tom, his best man and my dad. With some much needed help from my mum, we dressed the children and set off for to meet the photographer at the church for 10.15am.

That’s when it hit me. We’re getting married! The photographer was amazing. She made me feel so at ease and instantly settled my nerves. I’d already explained the plan to her and she’d promised me she’d help me execute it. She took some photos of my dress, shoes and flowers, and then it was time to tell Tom’s sister. I asked her to help me with the socially distanced seating plan for the church (they requested it so that it was one household per pew, with one pew inbetween). I then took her into the back room and asked her to be my bridesmaid. I’m so glad Danielle was there to capture that moment, not only because it was so special, but that hug was the first hug between Grace and I since the beginning of Covid. She helped me into my dress and went to fetch both my brothers from outside. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them speechless!

Tom had already told his best man who had since joined us in our little hideaway and so it was just waiting for the remaining guests to arrive to tell the congregation. Of course there were some who arrived fashionably late and I could sense from Tom’s text, “I need to tell them NOW” he was getting nervous. It felt like an eternity waiting in that room! I don’t know what he said, but the room suddenly erupted with claps and cheers. Everyone was happy. Phew! I don’t know why but I was so nervous people would be unhappy we were springing this on them.

The Vicar and my dad joined us in our hideaway and my brothers went to hand out our Orders of Service. I’ve never felt more proud than I did walking down that aisle, tottering on my “too high £6 heels” towards my soon-to-be husband. Tom looked so handsome and as I reached him he gave me the biggest grin and whispered “we made it”.

The service went without a hitch and was even more special as we Christened our son at the end. As we made our way to the back of the Church, the piercing sound of bagpipes echoed through and it was just a truly magical end to the most amazing couple of hours of my entire life. That was Tom’s little input. He’s always known how to steal a crowd!

 After the obligatory confetti throwing (I’d been drying petals from my neighbours garden for months and she’s since told me she thought I’d gone a bit nuts), we made our way over to our venue for a well-earned Prosecco and an afternoon tea!

 The venue blew us away. Nothing was too much to ask and Anna had willingly kept our little secret from the staff until the morning. My son has multiple food allergies and they went above and beyond catering for both him and I to ensure we still had the best experience. We’d hired a ball pool and some soft play and set it up in the orangery adjacent to the restaurant. Thank goodness because with 30 children in attendance they’d have run riot! It kept them well entertained and for under £100 for the whole day, it was worth every single penny.

 The speeches came and my Dad and Tom did us proud. I don’t know what I expected really, but they just felt perfect. We didn’t include a cake, we didn’t want a first dance (although we were forced into an impromptu one) and instead of a wedding breakfast, we’d organised an evening meal for our family. We chose a carvery and it was just incredible. The food was one of the major reasons we chose our venue and if you know us you know we love good food! After 18 months of Covid, 18 months of shielding, 18 months of missing important dates and events with family, sitting around that table meant everything. I had missed them all so much and all I wanted was bring everybody back together for a happy celebration.

 After a couple of drinks, a bit of singing (we love a rendition of Eternal Flame) and a lot of belly laughing, Tom and I took our very overtired children home. I put Chester to bed in my dress, Tom was tired and so he went to bed and I sat drinking Prosecco flipping through the preview of photos our photographer had sent through. She really was that good that she’d edited them all by 11pm! It was the perfect day and I wish I could do it all over again!

Wow! We’re absolutely speechless at this wedding. It’s clear to see from every photo how much love surrounded this wedding day and how much it meant to not only Jacqui and Tom but all their guests too. When Jacqui got in touch and told us she’d planned a wedding in secret we were absolutely intrigued by the story and just knew we had to feature her and Tom’s stunning day on the blog. We love that they kept the planning to themselves and we can only imagine what that meant to them after what Tom had been through and what they’d battled together as a couple. After so long away from each other it’s clear to see how much their family enjoyed the day. We hope you enjoyed reading their story as much as we enjoyed featuring it.

If you would like your small budget wedding featured on the blog then drop me an email at hello@thethriftybride.co.uk