Why it's O.K. to doubt all of your wedding choices

A lot of planning goes into making a wedding happen. From making it your perfect day to organising the logistics of things, even a small and relaxed wedding like ours requires a little planning commitment. Wedding suppliers can be booked up years until advance so it pays to be on the ball and get things booked in, but when your booking things so far in advance doubt starts to creep in and we begin wondering if we’ve made the right choices. Here’s why it’s perfectly O.K. and totally normal to doubt all your wedding choices.

Why it's normal to doubt your wedding choices

There are so many themes

Settling on a theme or colour scheme can be hard, after all there’s so many to choose from. When you finally decide you get a feeling of accomplishment and a sense of happiness of how to build your day to best represent you both. However because there are so many choices, sticking to one can be hard and you may start wondering at some point if you’ve gone with the right choice. This is perfectly normal when there’s so much choice and inspiration out there. We’ve gone for a subtle Disney theme as we both love Disney but I also love the look of alternative weddings with a more grungy feel to them. At one point I started questioning whether that’s the look and feel we should have gone for seen as I liked it so much but I know we had good reasons for picking our theme and it has a lot of meaning to us. As long as the day represents you both then the theme and colour scheme is right for you. What you have to remember is you picked your theme for a reason, more than likely because it’s what suits you as a couple perfectly. It’s ok to love the look of other themes but you picked yours for good reasons and you just have to remember what those good reasons are.

Social media influence

I’ve spoken before about how social media isn’t always the best when it comes to wedding planning. Sure it’s great for gaining a bit of inspiration but when it comes down to it, a lot of wedding stuff on social media is not only very expensive but also a bit cookie cutter in style in that nothing is all that original. The more you see the same things, the more you start to wonder if your missing out by not having them at your wedding.

The Instagram wedding community is huge and don’t get me wrong I love being a part of it but it can be overwhelming at times, especially if your doing your day a little differently to the traditional way. Being bombarded with images of other brides wedding planning can cause a serious case of FOMO and again you begin to wonder if there’s certain elements you should be adding to your day just because a lot of other people are doing the same.

If you’re having a budget wedding seeing all these big, lavish, expensive weddings can end up making you feel pretty bad about your choices. If this happens you should definitely take a big step back from social media and give yourself break. Wedding inspiration should be fun and definitely shouldn’t make you doubt your wedding choices.

Crisis in confidence

Having things booked so far in advance definitely gives your brain plenty of time to seriously over analyse things. You want your day to be perfect and worrying about every element of your day can make your confidence in your choices plummet. Having a break from all things wedding related every now and then will definitely help. Also when you feel up to it take a look at the thing you’re doubting and remember why you chose it whether it’s your dress, your venue and decorations. There’s a reason you fell in love with your choices but sometimes we all just need a little reminder. There a a big and often unnecessary pressure that we feel to get everything spot on and doubting yourself every now and then is normal. Just take a step back and came at it with a fresh perspective when you’re ready, obsessing over something won’t help.

Saying yes to the dress

You’ve said yes to the dress, you’re beaming and can’t stop thinking about it. You tell everyone who will listen that you’ve got your wedding dress and you spend ages looking at the photos of you in your dream dress. Then some time passes and you start to wonder if that dress really is the one. Maybe you should have tried on some more styles? Took more photos? Gone to more stores? Then of course there’s all those dresses on Pinterest and Instagram that you love but they don’t look anything like your dress so why didn’t you pick a dress like one of those ones? For me doubting my wedding dress choice has been one of the hardest things to deal with so far in wedding planning so much so that I’m going to do an entire post on it. It’s worth mentioning here though because it just fits in with so many of the other points. For some reason there is such a big focus on the dress, let’s be honest no one gives a crap what the groom is wearing but the bride on the other hand is a different matter. This focus, teamed with the pressure we put on ourselves to have selected the perfect dress can make us seriously doubt that our wedding dress is the one. I’d say if your dress is off the peg and stored at your house you should definitely try it on if you can. If not then spend some time with it out of the bag and just admiring the details etc to remember why you chose that dress. If your dress isn’t off the peg, look at the photos of your dress and write a list of all the reasons you picked that dress. If you don’t feel better after that maybe it might be worth contacting the store and asking to try the sample of your dress on again.

Basically it's perfectly normal to panic and doubt that you've made the right choices, we all go through it. Just try not to put too much pressure on yourself, as long as your wedding day is perfect for you and your partner, that's all that matters. If you're doubting your wedding choices take a step back from all things wedding related, give yourself a break and some time away and then come back to it refreshed. 

Have you had any parts of your wedding that you've been doubting? Let me know in the comments.

If you're a budget bride in a panic, why not join my Thrifty Bride Tribe on Facebook? I'm creating a community of budget brides who help and support each other so if you want a warm and welcoming place to be a part of, come and join us!

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